Friends are a huge part of a person’s life. They are there through the good times and bad. They give us guidance and understanding, comfort and support, stories and memories, and most of all their time and loyalty. Throughout our lives we will meet thousands of people. Hundreds of acquaintances will come and go, but only a few friends will always be there. But how do we decide who these people are? Where do we find them? And how do we keep them?
To begin finding a friend there needs to be interaction. Usually, all it takes is a smile or a greeting from you or someone else to spark a conversation. Talking to someone is a good way to figure out if you want to be friends with them. But remember, someone else isn’t always going to initiate the conversation. Sometimes you have to be a friend to make a friend. A compliment or a simple friendly introduction is a good way to make someone want to talk to you and make them comfortable enough to be themselves. When you are trying to make friends it is very important that you be yourself because when you portray your true interests, values, and personality, you will attract people with similar interests and values. A false image may mislead someone to think you are someone you are not and attract people that may not really be as compatible as a friend. Trying to fit in and make friends by pretending to be someone that you are not might make you confused on who you really are. Trying to be what others want you to be will not make you truly happy and you will most likely feel fake and uncomfortable around others. Once you find people who you share common interests with, you will find that you will generally enjoy spending time with them and want to get to know them better. As you spend more time with this person you will learn about them, create memories, and begin to develop a bond with them known as friendship. You will also begin to develop things like trust, loyalty, and understanding, which are crucial parts of friendship. Having friends is a wonderful thing, however maintaining a friendship takes some work. We need to remember that no one is perfect and everyone is different. Although you may like a lot of things about them, you will never like everything about someone else. Their little habits or the way they do things may irritate you, but remember, they may have been raised to do things differently. Therefore, remember to try and be open-minded but if something is really bothering you, let them know. Communication and understanding are some of the most important tools in maintaining any relationship. Another important feature of friendship maintenance is forgiveness. Because nobody is perfect, friends make mistakes. Depending on the severity of the screw up, a good friend will normally apologize and try to make it up to you, but in the end, forgiveness is what’s crucial for closure and renewal of friendship. Lastly, a good friendship requires time. Being a good friend means being there for them and supporting them. If your friend is at his state championship game, he’s going to expect you to be there cheering him on in the stands and celebrating afterwards too. And if your friend just got dumped by the guy you never liked anyway, she’s going to need a shoulder to cry on even though you told her so. Being there for a friend and putting in the time is a good way to show a friend that you care about them and they are important to you.
Although there are many people out there to choose from, there are few who will be lucky enough to be your friend. By being yourself and being a good friend, you will eventually find a handful of people that you care about, trust, and enjoy just as much as they do you. These people will become like your second family and although they are not always perfect or easy to be around, if you put in the time and effort to keep them around they will make it worth your while.
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